I Think I Can...

There are few things that can compare to the contradictory life of a two-year old. They are trying so hard to exert their independence, and still need so much help. My days are filled with these two sentences, and all the powerful emotions that accompany them: "No! I can do it MYSELF!", and "I no can do it!" Both statements carry the full dramatic weight of his frustrations at being 'big enough' and 'too small' at the same time. I don't know if there's another time of life the contrast is as clear again.

I find joy in his attempts at Independence, and I relate to his angst when he thinks he should be able to do something but cannot. As one can imagine, he has the patience of, well, a two-year old. That makes life a little more difficult for everyone. He attempts a task, finds he cannot immediately snap it into place as mommy can, and figures he 'no can do it!' This following a lively "No! I can do it MYSELF!" Herein lies both mother and son's frustrations! I remind myself that I do have patience beyond that of a two-year old, (though it doesn't always feel that way), and resist the urge to quickly take over and complete the simple task. Instead, I try to encourage him to try another way, or offer to help him do it. It's amazing both how much easier it would be just to do it myself, and how happy he is when he can do it himself. The contrast makes up for the moment you wish you could just do it and be done!

This contrast in life has also been closely followed by another. My sons are in the house much of the day and near the end of a long one, they are anxious to head out and see the world. Even if it's just a drive to the gas station, a trip to grandma's, or to pick up a few things at the store. The happiness I feel at being able to provide a small activity such as this, to 'get them out of the house', is quickly replaced by the strain of bringing the brief activity to an end. It's hard to give a toddler a 'fun' trip and then explain, that even though he hasn't passed out from exhaustion, explored every possible item within range, or visited until people have aged into retirement...it is time to go home. The tears and wails that accompany this message makes you wish he would shoot the messenger! It amazes me too that his sense of direction is so incredibly attuned to a fun activity coming to an end...that he can actually tell when we are pointed in the direction of home. Even when ranging farther from his every day territory than I would say he knew. It's like he has a homing beacon that goes off as soon as we point towards home, and his shrill cry of "I no wanna go home!" is the siren. Which strand of DNA is responsible for that I wonder?

I appreciate the difficulties that present themselves in the life of my toddler. I understand his frustrations. I wish he wasn't so loud about them...and I wish I was always graceful in dealing with them. We'll both learn. In the meantime...I'll have TWO more two-year olds to practice with. LUCKY ME!!